TOM BRADY?S WAR ON WOMEN
The NFL has a new headache and SewerBall has complete and exclusive coverage of this breaking scandal straight ahead
In a shocking revelation sure to make fans forget about Ray Rice and Jovan Belcher, Tom Brady brazenly refused to wear any pink regalia on his person when he suited up for a game against the Bills in Buffalo on Sunday October 12, 2014 in a display of disrespect that many sensitive fans and readers of this blog will surely find insensitive.
For starters, Brady could have done what so many other players do to curry favor with the PC tolerance mob: just fake it and put on some pink cleats, a pink headband, pink adhesive tape, a pink glove, a pink mouth guard, or a pink garter belt to show his solidarity with women folk. Brady ? a veteran player, three-time Super Bowl champion, and now, defiant out-of-the-closet troglodytic misogynist ? chose instead to proclaim his independence by steering clear of the pink garment theme making its rounds across NFL stadiums this month by players terribly eager to overcompensate for their ilk?s brutal treatment of women.
What?s worse is Brady was seen using a pink towel ? a heart-warming symbol of men?s unabiding love for women during NFL games played in October ? as a snot rag on the Patriots? bench. Typical male ! That?s right, you read that correctly. SewerBall?s legal team is scrambling at the moment to investigate whether or not this constitutes a hate crime. So far, no human rights commission has taken action in this matter, but more details will follow as this breaking story is sure to get traction.
This is October, people. It is theee time for grandstanding, P-whipped men everywhere to don all kinds of pink-colored insignia in an effort to debase themselves and shamelessly undermine their manhoods all in a desperate effort to appease the creeping forces of political correctness. Look, if Mr. Brady refuses to play along, then can limiting women?s reproductive rights be far behind as an agenda item on the NFL?s hit list ? These troubling developments have SewerBall?s shoe-leather journalists ? okay, me ? asking: what else is Mr. Brady hiding here ? His disdain for our mothers, our sisters, our daughters, our wives, our mistresses, and our cleaning ladies at this point is a given and makes one wonder how much further exactly he would like to roll back women?s rights, if only he had his way.
At this point, events have spiraled out of control so much that SewerBall feels something has to be done urgently to right Brady?s wrongs. Thus, it behooves the Patriots to take corrective action of one kind or another: if the organization will not bench the star quarterback in their next game, can head coach Bill Belichick at least wear high heels to show his disapproval of this unchecked anti-woman conduct in his ranks ?