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In response to no popular demand whatsoever, I’ve decided to join the swollen ranks of talking heads and opinion-spewing junkies the world over by launching my very own blog. I hereby present SewerBall ! The idea combines the love of baseball(and other sports) with the joy of pontificating about these things from a base of knowledge which occasionally runs as deep as the Cubs’ collection of championship banners and other times as deep as a Harmon Killebrew blast before HGH. Much like the varying assortment of trash you normally find strewn about a sewer, you will find no uniformed theme here either. So when I put all the disparate thoughts running through my head into a blender and hit power, the sludge that comes out is ‘SewerBall’ ? I went all in on the concept. And as I sink my nails into the seams of SewerBall, you can be certain that what results will be about as linear as an R.A. Dickey knuckler and as predictable as a Mitch Williams heater.

Yes, and that’s not all. I’ve even embarked on a most unconventional marketing campaign to get the word out. That’s right, I fired my stodgy marketing rep who kept calling the cops on me when I sussed out my ideas to him and, instead, I’m going with my gut to pull out all the stops. I have not only resorted to the usual billboard advertising, but I’ve taken it a step further to resurrect the ol’ dirigible to fly around major population centers to raise awareness about SewerBall and what can happen when someone like me is allowed to spout off about a dizzying array of topics. I may yet make Tim Berners-Lee regret giving those like me a forum via his World Wide Web.

This is not a schtick; it’s SewerBall. It?s here to either dazzle or enlighten or amuse or make you wish you were never born. Its potential is almost limitless ? if you give it an honest bounce, it can lengthen and it can strengthen, but too often it will do what sewers do: make you sick to your stomach. Don?t give up hope though because, when approached correctly, SewerBall can inspire as well as bring out the best in you if only you make the conscious decision to listen with your eyes; if not, the experience may leave you needing to see a therapist. So it is my earnest hope that you will read as much of it as you can stand, but, either way, you have my solemn word that if you promise to play SewerBall with me, then I promise to play SewerBall with you.

Alas, these, my friends, are the laser-beam insights you can expect to find on Sewerball ! So if you open your think box and check back daily, I promise to lay some serious wisdom on you ? SewerBall-style.

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